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DISNEY TIME!

Bank Holiday Mondays in the UK aren't what they used to be. At least on the telly. In the old days you could rely on a Roger Moore-era Bond film, a circus and Disney Time. In which the star du-jour would takes us through some old clips and something from the new offering as a bit of gentle promo. If it was on today it would probably have Lily James as presenter so that we could all be reminded of the new live action Cinderella. However now we have property and antiques shows, just like every other bloody weekday of the year. Well don't worry. I'm here to give you the next best thing. And you know what's coming at the end don't you?


Here's the  playlist


HEIGH HO! (Snow White And The Seven Dwarfs)
This is actually a lot more than just the Dwarfs (as something of a Tolkien scholar I struggle with when to use Dwarfs and Dwarves, but that's another story). First we get the unfeasibly high pitched Snow White. Do not listen if you have a dog. It also includes 'Whistle While You Work' ("Don't tell him Pike!") which we will return to in a slightly piss-taking mode with Enchanted and the 'Happy Work Song'. Then we move to the Dwarfs working in the mine until the knock-off whistle goes, and finally they march home satisfied with a day's work pulling about 50 million dollars worth of diamonds from the ground. Why do they live in a tiny cottage and can't even afford to hire a cleaner. There's no sign of a cruel and exploitative gangmaster. The movie is cushion-grabbingly scary when the wicked queen shows her true colours. Also features an early form of motion capture as Snow White was animated over film of a live actor. This rotoscoping technique was also used to awful effect in ex-Disney animator's rubbish, half finished animated version of Lord of the Rings.

I GOT NO STRINGS (Pinocchio)
It's quite Germanic isn' it? Could've been written by Wagner. Kind of strident and martial. In the early days of Disney animations the voices tended to be cartoonish too, so Pinocchio has a kind of parody of a small boy's voice. Since the whole story is more of a set of parables than a coherent narrative, the movie is a bit disjointed too. Introduced Jiminy Cricket and 'When You Wish Upon A Star', which became pretty much Disney's theme tune.




HE'S A TRAMP (Lady And The Tramp)
Disney cottoned on to the fact that jazz and their animated movies made good bedfellows. Peggy Lee delivers a drowsy, languid tribute to the backstreet mongrel who woos his uptown girl over a plate of spaghetti and meatballs. Listen to those doggy backing vocals. Genius. There's something about the animation in Lady and the Tramp that sets it apart from the rest for me, it sort of makes a transition to a cleaner, lusher look from the early films. I guess I'm saying that you can judge the date of the movie from the animation style - it shares something with the early Tom and Jerry's.



WHEN I SEE AN ELEPHANT FLY (Dumbo)
Pun-terrific! The gang of crows are relentless in their wordplay. An early, relatively positive depiction of black American characters too. "I be done seen about ever'thing, when I see an elephant fly". It's quite a short movie - around an hour I think, and it's heartbreakingly sad in places too. Things get a little weird when Dumbo and Timothy the mouse get drunk and see pink elephants, which could have been a cut scene from Fantasia.




I WANNA BE LIKE YOU (Jungle Book)
I reckon this must have been the first Disney animated movie that I saw at the cinema. It belongs in their Jazz period, and this song is sung by Louis Prima (hence the name!) but also features the great Phil Harris who appeared in a number of Disney movies around the time. The scatting at the end is terrific. "Take me home, Daddy!". Like Pinocchio, Kipling's original text is episodic and the movie does lurch a bit from on set-up to the next, but who cares? It's all great.  George Sanders is deliciously evil as Shere Khan. "Maan!"



WHERE DID I PUT THAT THING/BIBBIDI, BOBBIDI-BOO (Cinderella)
Only watched Cinderella once I think. Bit too twee even for Disney. This is a good bit of nonsense though, as the Fairy Godmother does her stuff. I remember there was another song by the mice where they pronounce her name 'Cinderelly', presumably because it's easier to rhyme than Cinderella. The purple and blue striped cat was a bit odd wasn't it?




CRUELLA DE VIL (101 Dalmatians)
Dodie Smith's novel was one of my favourites as a kid, and 101 Dalmations was the first film me and J saw at the cinema together (the original animation on re-release), so it's fair to say I hold it close in my affections. The animation's a bit slapdash, but that's just how they did it. I like the American versions of English accents too, the way one of the two henchmen (Horace I think) pronounces his mate's name Jaaasper is great. I also like the idea of TV programme 'What's My Crime', someone should pitch that to Endemol. They mucked about with the dog's names in the movie. The dalmatian couple in the book were Pongo and Missus, and Perdita was a kind of wet-nurse for all the pups. This song is the one that Roger composes and finally makes his fortune. Weird confession time - I secretly fancied Cruella De Vil a bit.

FOLLOWING THE LEADER (Peter Pan)
Short and sweet. Peter Pan has been done umpteen times over the years. Good for Great Ormond Street, but I suspect the story is of more interest to adults missing their lost youth than kids. Captain Hook was a great character in the Disney cartoon today. This is the lost boys having a laugh.






THOMAS O'MALLEY (The Aristocats)
Phil Harris again. I had this as a single when young. I could never work out what the "Abraham De Lacey, Guiseppe Casey" line was. My interpretation was something like Geo-suppla-casey. I was torn on picking a song from this one. I love 'Everybody Wants To Be A Cat' featuring the multinational cat Jazz band and 'Scales and Arpeggios', but I chose this for sentimental reasons.

LET'S GO FLY A KITE (Mary Poppins)
Too many to choose from, so I picked this because it's also the most uplifting moment from 'Saving Mr Banks' It features Dick Van Dyke's risible cockernee accent. He pronounces "dance" as "dornce", but to complain about that would be to rob the movie of one of it's most appealing features. This comes right at the end as Mr Banks is indeed saved by his children and learns that the most important thing in life is to have fun and spend time with your family.


UNDER THE SEA (The Little Mermaid)
J wanted me to choose 'Part Of Your World'. But I prefer this. You can't beat rhymes like"Things can be better, down where it's wetter". This was a genuine case of return to form for Disney after years in the wilderness where they were putting out stuff like The Fox And The Hound, The Brave Little Toaster, The Rescuers and Basil The Great Mouse Detective. Alan Menken was responsible for the music and has continued to come up with the goods ever since



PRINCE ALI (Aladdin)
Sung by the late great Robin Williams. terrific lyrics in this one. My fave is "Genuflect, Show some respect, Down on one knee". He also pronounces the "w" in "swords". "He's got the Monkeys, Let's see the Monkeys!". First computer animated character in this movie - the magic carpet. It also started a trend for straight to video sequels.





HAWAIIAN ROLLER COASTER RIDE (Lilo and Stich)
Wasn't sure about Lilo and Stich when it came out. Bit of a departure to do a modern day tale of a orphaned girl and her pet alien. The music is largely Elvis songs, which was a good choice given his association with Hawaii and the quality of the choice on offer. 'Burning Love' is particularly memorable. I like this one most though. The singing sounds easy and breezy, but you can tell that the harmonies are incredibly complex. Ohana means family and family means no-one gets left behind.

I'LL MAKE A MAN OUT OF YOU (Mulan)
Montage time. Chang has to knock his hopeless bunch of recruits into an effective fighting force in 3 minutes of film time. They can't climb the pole, fire an arrow straight or handle a quarterstaff. But eventually Mulan figures out how to get the flag and it all comes together until at the end they all move in unison. "BE A MAN! You must be swift as a coursing river; With all the force of a great typhoon: With all the strength of a raging fire; More mysterious than the dark side of the moon. HA!".



I WON'T SAY I'M IN LOVE (Hercules)
An underrated movie with great songs, of which this is by far and away my favourite. Meg finally realises that she's in love with Herc. The way it starts with "That's ancient history, been there, done that". and the response "Who d'ya think you're kidding, he's the Earth and Heaven to you" is just perfect. Disney succeed in mixing modern vernacular with the ancient setting and James Woods as Hades is hilarious. Best use of the word "egregious" ever.




GASTON (Beauty And The Beast)
Didn't go for the obvious for this one. He has biceps to spare and every last inch of him is covered with hair. He's also especially good at expectorating, which is boast all of us would like to be able to make. Anyway, I quite like Gaston. He's a man of simple tastes and makes a change from all the metrosexuals that the modern entertainment biz foists on us.Disney really moved into another dimension with this, getting a best picture Oscar nomination (first time for a cartoon).



HAPPY WORKING SONG (Enchanted)
Disney now start to poke gentle affectionate fun at themselves, which is quite a trick after Dreamworks poked cruel, mocking fun at them in the diminishing-returns Shrek series. Amy Adams made her name in this and rightly so. She's absolutely spot on as the Disney princess having to cope with modern day New York. She manages to recruit various urban vermin to help her out as she cleans up the apartment and deals with mildew stains and scrubbing the lavvie.




HAKUNA MATATA (The Lion King)
Timon and Pumbaa share their recipe for a happy life with Simba - don't worry about it. Unfortunately not good advice for a dispossessed monarch whose Uncle is running down the kingdom. They sort it all out in the end though. Saw the stage version recently and T&P were a highlight, really cleverly rendered as full body puppets. The sing also features in Toy Story as it is on the car radio as Andy's family drive away from their old home. I'm beginning to come round to the idea that I'll have to do a full blog post on Elton, but not just yet.

HEAVEN'S LIGHT/HELLFIRE (The Hunchback Of Notre Dame)
Another underrated one. And the second part of this song, sung by the baddie, Frollo, is pretty much as dark as Disney is ever likely to get. Let's not beat about the bush, he's having uncontrollable lustful thoughts about Esmeralda, and the film itself doesn't try to particularly hide it. It's sung by Tony Jay, and although he's clearly no trained singer, the performance is fabulous. That guy has got woman issues for sure.





LET IT GO (Frozen)
There really isn't much to say other than that the list wouldn't be complete without it. Endlessly parodied, but this is about the best in my view.









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